Melvyn the Bored- Northern lights

In the land of the north wind, and long snow filled gloom,

when the sun rises and sets each side of noon.

Around the fires of the long houses they sit and tell tales.

They retell Sagas and stories of long boats and sails

of times long gone when spirits took on solid form

in the grand hall of Valhalla all cosy and warm.

Of Odin, his throne and of the hammer of Thor

Of Tyr’s sword and armour the great god of war

When Huginn and Muninn Odin’s great ravens soared

And the naughty step for Melvyn the bored.

In the school for the gods where knowledge was told

Apprentices learnt from magicians so old

That spoke in soft words with monotonous drone

The pupils would nod off and distraction were prone

In reception class seven poor Melvyn stayed

For in none of the exams a good score he made

So in the same class he is destined to remain

Listening to the same lessons again and again

As the teacher talked on in his most boring style

Melvyn in a miasma slipped out for a while

Huginn and Muninn the messenger of Odin followed on to see what trouble Melvyn would get up to this time. They should of told Odin of his escape from school but Melvyn was a kindly child that stroked Huginn’s rough beak and smoothed his course feather for Huginn was such a scruffy bird. Muninn also thought kindly of Melvyn for he loved to listen to Muninn’s songs and loved the sound of his raucous shrill voice

down to the isle of Orkney he went

to the old isle of Hoy where good times are spent

snuggled in a sea cave feeling content

alas was a cave, fisher folk would frequent

on hearing the fisher folk approaching quite near

he hid in a crevice and stifled his fear

for the fisher folk were cut-throats and exceedingly queer

grumpy and bad tempered this time of the year

I hate the winter with cold and frostbite

long hours of darkness of long winter night

it's hard catching fish when there's no light

and there's only a few nights to fish by moonlight

Melvyn the Bored his mission was clear

To help the poor fishermen with customs so queen

To the magnetic north he’d go when it's all clear

Maybe make the earth turn slowly  extending the year

Melvyn the bored well out of his stride

Tinkered and fiddled and botched things beside

he dropped a tool ,and when it, and the machinery collide

Bright flashes soon lit up the sky far and wide

Amazed islanders “tis light” they all cried

Melvyn’s chard body a smoulder

Saw the bright light over his shoulder

thought he'd best leg it if he wants to get older

the light might upset Tyr or Balder

Back on Hoy to his delight

The islanders loved these Northern lights

The sailors tell of them where ever they went

at least some one was happy or even content

Odin was not, and in a rage would bellow

bring me the head of the troublesome fellow

that set the earth wobble and turn darkness mellow

Loki god of mischief and fire a frost giant bedfellow

liked the new colour that he called yellow

Frigga suspected it was Melvyn's doing

with the works of the earth he had been screwing

all out of balance which needed redoing

so gave the south the light that they were viewing

Odin decreed and so it was done

a light in the south not a bright as the sun

it seemed to please most, if not everyone

of Melvyn, the gods he could not outrun

they caught him and beat him, one by one