idiot hunter

You should have a hobby in your spare time

Get out more and stop writing rhyme

You should be more like me you know

Always on the hunt always on the go

“What is that you do that keeps you fit”

I hunt for idiots and love every bit

“Idiot hunting that I’ve not heard

To me that hobby seems pretty absurd”

The collectors international association

That collects idiots from every nation

They catalogue and write about so free

Their intrinsic logical stupidity

“What is an idiot how can you tell?”

They talk in cliques not very well

They always brag about driving fast

Good times that were had in the past

Sporting facts they can quickly relate

Dismantle cars on their first date

Buying fast food to save washing up

Drinking brandy from a tea cup

Spending most nights in a garden shed

Trying to fix a mower passed as dead

Has intricate knowledge of parking lots

For classic cars they have the hots

Freely give unasked for poor advice

Most descriptive word used is nice

“Why is my friend looking at me?

All’s well that ends well apparently

At the end of the day all being equal

Discussing Ford Cortina’s and the sequel

Two hours from Edinburgh to Newcastle

Could be faster but would be a hassle

Parking in Newcastle I could go on for hours

Lacking multi-storey car parking towers

My friend is leaving his visit overdue

I advise don’t do anything I wouldn't do

My friend’s ticking boxes and smiling with glee

I think the idiot hunter’s just bagged me